the awesome

2009-07-17T19:58:00.000-07:00

That what I feel is real sincere.

3 hrs of POA in skewl + 2 more hrz with ze babypig. Some one jab me to sleep, am sleep rest entertainment constrained!

Econs, fuck you.

POA, fuck you harder.

Thkz euw for teaching your nerdo gf. Much appreciated. I promise to give you an addition of 1 extra minute every time we talk on the phone every night ok? Ok can.

Yey babypig`s on his way to meet me. Now, I`m craving for bubble tea. Aunty ah, Chocolate Oreo satu.

2009-07-16T23:55:00.000-07:00

Skewl is god damn tiring. God damned tiring.

I have never felt so lethargic before in my life and ironically I have to be working on my assignmentz yet I`m dwelling with my technological lovepie. Asspie.

Piglet dear I`m v v v v sorry if I have been neglecting you eversince I`ve became a SIM card. He calls me that just because I`m an SIM student. Nevermind don`t ask. I said don`t ask. Ok yes I`m sorry. Skewl is taking a major toll on me. Major of all majors.

But it`s crucial. You are crucial too.
You + Friendz -> Crucial
Skewl -> Crucial-er
Skewl -> Examz -> Crucial-er-er.

I can only juggle 1 Crucial at 1 time. It`s hard to squeeze everything into my stubby fat fingerz. I miss my friendz too and I bet they miss me more. Don`t deny. Warning, DON`T. They`re busy with skewl and I`m as nerdified as each and every one of them retards.

Your nerdo gf has to study now. Lurplurpz.

2009-07-15T17:20:00.000-07:00

My attendance in class is 95.13% just because I forgot to sign on my own attendence on ze 1st day. Bodoh.

Econs, fuck you.

2009-07-14T19:47:00.000-07:00

Tucking into your comfort zone.

!W brought me to Sheng Shiong yesterday after school and we got junk food for me. Junk fuel refilled. I is happy-go-fucky.

Gotta go skewl now I`ve got English lecture today! I heart English! Aload.

2009-07-13T23:38:00.000-07:00

SKEWL, I WANT FLEND HEUW BACK!

Hi Karthika Hi someone Hi someone and Hello to someone. I only manage to recall 1 person`s name. Don`t call me pathetic, at least my eyes were participating during lecture. My lucturer is cute. Short stubble like a walking boat.

Oh yes if you`re wondering which skewl I`m in. I`m in W.P (Woodlandz Polyclinic) HAHA Sofia not funny. Okayokay. I`m in SIM. Singapore`s Institute of Management. Management not mental, butch.

And heuw know whud? Eye yam ze only malay yin klaz. Boo.

Oh! Did I mention we have smoke breakzz?
V^____________^V

2009-07-13T19:56:00.000-07:00

SKEWL, I DON`T FLEND HUEW!

Monday to Thursday : 1400hrs - 1700hrs
Friday : 0930hrs - 1230hrs

But all students are required to attend class or activites before and after lectures. Cheap-bhai!

Know how last minute I can get? Skewl starts at 1330hrs later and currently it 1100hrs. Not showered and breakfast-less. Woke up an hour ago to check my booklist and timetable.

Mother : What are you doing at the computer?
Me : Using it.
Mother : For?
Me : My timetable, booklist. I need to print out.
Mother : Now then you`re doing this?
Me : Ya la ya la.

Mother walked away and I was continuing with my task. Chey, task. Okayokay. Till I got fed- up because the printer wouldn`t print. It`s just wouldn`t. Mother retraced her steps and approached me again.

Mother : Oh ya. I forgot to tell. There`s no more ink.
Sof : -_-"""

Shall I cry? No I shan`t. I shall save my tears for skewl later. In anycase today marks a special day for me and my baby. I wish my skewl would postpone to tomorrow or something. You`re celebrating it all alone till 1830hrs.

Happy 4 months! Happy 4 months! Happy 4 months! Happy 4 months! Happy 4 months! Happy 4 months! Happy 4 months! Happy 4 months! Happy 4 months! Happy 4 months! Happy 4 months! Happy 4 months! Happy 4 months! Happy 4 months! Happy 4 months!

I love you and I cannot wait to pinch your manly nipples when I see you later after skewl.

2009-07-12T00:01:00.000-07:00

Locked in your arms.

Feeling lighter at my ass. If I were to weigh the shit I just passed out, it could have weighed 1kg. Solid. Am disgusting? Sorry decent-shitters I don`t shit like you all. There`s no time for glamour when my ass is stuck in the toilet seat.

Yesterday I went out with Hartini who was as usual dilly dallying her way to meet me. She was 1 hour late. No I`m serious. Seriously lying. We were on time. Both of us. After going out for the past 1 year we were both finally on time yesterday. Plus Hartini was rushing off to buy her new phone. Don`t forget to show it off to me mmkays! Lurp huew.

Cheers to us both. As for my hours afterso, I spent my night overnighting. Had a swell swell time. Swell I tell you. Swell is not swollen. Swollen is your brain. Swell is the time I spent yesterday. Get ze diff?

Anyways I`m sorry Hafizah darling and Fart Bamadhick I couldn`t tag along for Ice Age 3. I`m broke. Spent my money on unwise things. You guys enjoy yourself. Write an email about the movie`s review okay? Okay. I miss you terribly my darling. Yes yes and you too pussy.

Tomorrow is my 1st day in skewl. Oh no! I`m shivering! Shivering! Somebirdy switch the air-con off. Plz plz wish me luck. I don`t think I`ll shit in my pants tomorrow. Because

1) I`m wearing jeans, not pants.
2) I shitted enough today.

My fantasy lover is on TV again. I muz go and zee hym now.
MJ wait fer yer loveling here! ^^V

2009-07-09T09:49:00.000-07:00

Stupid pussy called me fat.

Fart : Gemuk.
Me : Gemuk nenek kau bodoh.
Fart : Biar ah. Die da nak mati pon. Kau tu masih muda tak nak exercise. Bodoh.

Farhat Abbas Bamadhick is an ogly bitch.
Ogly ogly ogly!

Another thing is, I am not ready to become unkewl fer skewl. Skewl is scaring me. Inside out upside down leftside right backside front. I`m shaking with fear and unarmed with having to cope with rules, classes, and homosapies of different planets. (Imagine : A bunch of E.Ts)

Me : What if I have no friends?
Me : What if I get into trouble on the 1st day itself?
Me : What if I shit in my pants?
Me : Okay Sof. Zip.

Am zipping. In any case, think about having to go to Bukit Timah all ze way from Woodlands every single weekday. If I`m unlucky, weekends might be a burn-out as well. There goes my baby`s hope of spending a weekend with me because Sunday would definitely be a stay home since Monday`s skewl again. See how the unkewl-ness derives? Sad isn`t it? Better yet, his departure has indeed to come. NS.

Shaving your pretty pretty hair off your scalp and you`ll look just like any other of your hairless mates. Rambutans. A manly rambutan if that makes you feel better.

Oh. The. Reluctance. Oh. My. Head. Oh. The. Stress. Oh. Oh. Ohohohohohoo. Bye.

2009-07-09T07:51:00.000-07:00

Being my pill and addiction.

On my birthday WHICH IS ON THE 29TH THIS MONTH (!!!) I would love to have a ginormous cake made from IKEA`s sweet delicious mouth-watering brownie. Spoil me plz. Plz eye yam begging huew!

Happy belated 17th birthday Rohzaini. Never thought I`d be as close to you because trust me it was hard for me to bond with you at first. You are a funny witty fella with amazing artistic talentz. I love your brother so much.

Eh eh don`t get imaginative and bitchy. His brother = my boyfriend.
Wuds eeyore probz dewd?

2009-07-08T10:44:00.000-07:00

HIP HIP HURRAH!

I can upload pictures. So I`m guessing you`re scared of me Blogger.com. I`m not guessing I know. Like, I`m tough and you`re just a pair of baby tits. That`s disgusting.

Have been active in Facebook. Hi reader if you are a facebooker plz feel free and discounted to add me there. Am lacking of friends. Liar liar! Speaking of friends I miss Hartini and Qarl. IKEA this Saturday plz because this loser here starts her 1st day of school on Monday.

Lu budak mana? Gua L.K siot! Hidop mati LongKang!

Annoying. I want to hear good stuffz! Don`t ask me to tune to some radio station.
" Only hear the good stuffs "

Bullshiet. You think what your father radio station is it?

2009-07-08T10:37:00.000-07:00

I`ll sink with your tears.

Want to know what`s ze only thing in this world so far that has actually pee-ed on me without getting slapped, killed, tortured, burned, nailed or kicked?

Bubo.
(Warning : Don`t laugh at his name. Don`t.)

Ilyas : Look look at it`s tail kakak! So cute! Awwwwww!
Me : Oi since when you become so sissy?

Yes asswipes it`s still alive. STILL.

2009-07-08T10:00:00.000-07:00

We will resolve.

It took me 3 painful hours to seize the attention of my little cousin but it only took piglet lesser than half and hour to get her hugging and clinging onto him. Najwa mean.

Piglet`s such a lover to toddlers babies and children. He can be ze next MJ. Infact he already is. My MJ with a big big tummy but a bigger heart. I talk Barney. Hi fren will euw tok Barney wif me? Fine I shall stop.

I read ze instructions for several times yet I couldn`t get a clue how it works. Not my brain`s fault. Stupid duck-game inventor.

Ratio of attention given to Najwa is to me by my baby is 10:1.
I demand a recalculation! I demand! A demand is in demand now Nurizuan.

I don`t know what awaits tomorrow. Skewl startz on Mondead. Not kewl to go skewl. Skewl fer lewzah. Lewzah are smokers. Rokok! Ro-cock! Fish euw Dzul.

2009-07-08T09:07:00.000-07:00

Just hold my hand, and I`ll be there.

I promise you faith, love, care and concern. I also promised the best for us both that`s why I`m here to tell you your mistakes like how you tell me mine. Though my preference would be a soft and loving approach.

Compromising is the key to remedizing our aching hearts. Or at least, mine.

2009-07-07T23:44:00.000-07:00

One solid crystal clear reason why Dzulfaqar and I can never meet.

Zulfaqar`s (useless and uberly nonsensical) theory :
Sof like to rokok. Rokok = Ro-cock.
Sof kau suke rocock? Hahahaahahahah.

Sof`s (excellent and fantab) theory :
Dzulfaqar suck eggz. Dzulfaqar = Dzul-FUCKER.
Dzulfucker fuckz like a whimp. A whimp`s whimp.

Eh Dzul stop disturbing me. I`m getting tired finding lame theories to rebutt yourz. I don`t want to lose because you being the biggest whimp, you won`t shut your gap.

Readerz stop whinning that my posts are plain and bland. You think I enjoy screening through words and only words? I don`t. Blame blogger. Sue it. I have yet to show off a couple of hysterical picturez.

2009-07-07T20:07:00.000-07:00

The functions against you and me.

Dropped by baby`s workplace yesterday. Frankly am not a fan of Gayland. Geylang. But where he was working at wasn`t so bad. Except that he`s always been complaining about a fat barber whose shop`s just beside his. I don`t blame my boyfriend a single bit. I enjoy complaining too.

Problem is, that ugly son of a gun was always saying mean things about piglet to ze boss when piglet did nothing wrong. Knnbccb! So old so crippled and such a pain. Piglet`s there to work and not to plz you. Stop being annoying you dried old screw.

Swear that fatfuck was ugly horrifying smelly disgusting and an imprudence. When walked pass him his eyes were constantly at me and baby. Maybe he was deprived of sex. Fish you. If you bully my boyfriend again something bad will happen to you and your mother in law and your father in law. Why in law? I can guarentee he`s not married that`s why.

Well if he is, that`s one hell of a ugly barber`s miracle.

Putting that fat fucker aside, I have plans today. Or a plan at least. Meeting piglet and Shawal later for dinner at Bukit Timah. Teh tarik satu. Tarik tinggi tinggi pretty plzz.

2009-07-06T08:24:00.000-07:00

R.I.P grandfather from my paternal side.
You weren`t that close to me but it saddens having to break a bond.

May god bless you in your grave and may your journey in ze afterworld be a breeze.
Love you Atuk though never have I said that to you.

2009-07-05T23:59:00.000-07:00

Blogger.com please read :
You are the biggest ugliest crappiest bitchiest source of blogging ever created by mankind. I hate you Blogger.com I HATE YOU. To the deepest core of my mother`s dog`s flea`s anus.

In anycase I`ll deal with you later Blogger.com. Be scared. Be terrified you technological slut.

Spoke to !W only for half an hour because I was distracted by the TV which was showing clipz of an exotic man who dances and sings like a god. His charm. His charisma. His wrath. His flawless hair. His soothing voice. His fancy dress code. His Owww! Ho mai god so sexy! So merciless.

You know who I referring to not? Know not? Know not? I give you clue kayz. M and J.
If you say Mary Jane, I`ll show you Mary Jane tomorrow. Stewpigkk.

2009-07-05T23:27:00.000-07:00

Was about to blog again but piglet called.

!W : Baby you want gd news or bad?
Me : Good.
!W : There`s MJ`s top 40 songs in MTV now.
Me : Really?! Ehehheeeee! Eh wait, then the bad?
!W : I can`t talk to you much cause you`ll be busy watching.

Well said. I`ll come back again after 11pm. My fantasy lover is on TV! ON TV!

2009-07-05T20:26:00.000-07:00

YEY!

Piglet loveling (lover + darling) I lalalove you!

2009-07-04T09:38:00.000-07:00

For it`s just going to get better.

As promised, a blastworthy time with the 3 cows. Followed by a couple more mortals. Nonis and his pesky little brother, Fandy and Haqim. Sang songz cracked a ga-zillion crap jokes. Fwendz eye heart euw ols!

Met Fart pussy as we waited for the 2 other cows who were busy making love in ze train. Fucken late. Fucken.

I like calling him handsome. He`ll start blushing like a little sissy. A handsome sissy okay!

2 pussies and the pussies' pussy.

Ah fuck you I can`t play ze guitar.

"You know I`m bad, I`m bad.." MJ momentz as usual.

And to make it bad-er, there`s a small vandalism at the left corner.

Come come. Lu ade hal pa?

Eyeliner experiment #2 on Yasin.

Eventually they got tired of singing and started carrying 1 another.

Nonis. Pose. Stop. It. Sia.

Sara : Kay 1,2,3 jump!
Sara : Eh alamak I press before I said jump! Sorry sorry!

Vhatt la deyh Sara?

Fart cannot jump. Fart loser. Lewzah fer lyfe!

Afterwhich I left a tad earlier to meet piglet. By right as stated in AJ, I had a family reunion that piglet promised to accompany me to but due to major time constrain, we skipped and had dinner at Lot 1 instead.

Ice Kachang without kachang/ jelly/ or any gooey disgusting topping, Kway Teow cockles without cockles, mushroom soup with extra pepper for myself. Shut up if you have any nasty comment about my food order. Only I can comment. I said shut up. Shut up.

Piglet sent me home after that. Great great time today. Cows you guyz rock. Stone. Boulder. Pebble. Thank me for saying those thingz. Thank me! Awwh you are welcome.

2009-07-04T09:27:00.000-07:00

You can say and say all you can.

AJ`s finally updated after a v v v long time. Now broken heart I secretly hope my 3 cowz can put a spark to this empty feeling when I meet them later (which is in 15 minutes time and yet I`ve not showered). Wait, no need to hope actually cause my friends always do.

So sweet of me to say so. Love me cows! Me moo you guyz too.

2009-07-03T08:19:00.000-07:00

Reach in and grab before it flakes off.

Was walking home. Wanted to light my cigg till I realised that I didn`t have a lighter. A stupid habit I`d say. Thus leading me having to put up a plastic smile and ask for 1. My memory`s rusted and busted. There was this 1 time when I brought my lighter but I forgot my cigg. Okay I bet you don`t really care.

So I asked a distinguished dressed guy wearing a shirt that I found rather familiar. What a coincidence it was my friend, Meyh. Ashmeir to be exact.

Me : Meyh!
Ashmeir : Soffey! Hi! Sialaa how are you?
Me : I`m fine I`m fine. Can I ask you something?
Ashmeir : Sure. Anything.
Me : You got lighter?

Ashmeir : You forever sia no lighter.
Me : I know. Forget ah blame my brain.
Ashmeir : Of course la. You smoke smoke until your brain corrupt like this.
Me : Did my mother pay you to tell me this?

Ashmeir : You always ask for lighter if you forget eh?
Me : You think god wants to send it to me from heaven is it?
Ashmeir : Fine fine anyways do you know that a smoker without a lighter..
Me : Is a mother fucker. Yes I know. I get that alot. Thanks eh thanks.

Me : MJ died. Sad sia.
Ashmeir : What you want me to do?
Me : Can you save the earth by writing songs?
Ashmeir : Cannot.
Me : Ah then shut up la.

Me : Oh my god I use to have the same shirt like yours! But I gave it away to some fucker.

Ashmeir : Uhmm yeah. Me.

Ashmeir I`m sorry for calling you a fucker. I didn`t mean it at that point of time. I`m sorry dear friend. But of all ze other times that I`ve called you a fucker or a hoe or any other flashy mean nickname, I meant each and every one of them. Sincerely from my pitless heart.

I`m missing my friends. A lot! And that`s why I`m meeting 3 of the cows tomorrow afternoon! Yasin, Fart, Saravanan please wake up early for me tomorrow. For you favourite gegerl here. Plz. Now don`t make me be a STMF to you 3 because I don`t want to.

STMF : Sweet talk mother fucker.

2009-07-02T22:14:00.000-07:00

Oi blogger! Blogger you motherfucker please allow me to upload my pretty pictures. Please? Don`t make me threaten you and call the M.O.I (Ministry of Internet). MOI!

1 more hour. To bathe. To clear my bedsheet. To get dressed. To walk to ze bus stop. To wait for ze bus. To board ze bus. To alight ze bus and wait for another bus to Bukit Panjang. I can`t do that.

Mainly I is just sexcited to see my babypig.

2009-07-02T09:46:00.000-07:00

You`ll get in my arms.

Though I told you I hated baby`s new job it didn`t thoroughly mean the whole job you mindless faggotz. Working hourz for pete`s sake. I pity him having to rise so early and come home with body aches here and there.

So zip that string of assumptions because you can save it for yourself.

Today I can officially label myself as 1 of the Aunties who sits at ze coffee shop sipping teh after teh smoking sticks after sticks making a simple dish last for 3 hrz. Did so with the other 3 Aunties. !W, Haiqal and Shawal. Was expecting Naddy to come along with Wal. If you`re reading this, Hi Nad!

Ordered Roti John with cheese and mustard. Fishing nice.

Camera shy. Just for 10 minutes aye Haiqal? Don`t lie. I said don`t!

Was looking at my friend. Who is it you ask?

Hi friend. See what see?

Finally Shawal ordered himself food while I was unentertained by my boyfriend who turned into a car crashing gamer. All thanks to that laptop. Fish. Then Haiqal got bored of taking pictures of his surrounding and demanded,

" Sof amek kan la gambar kite! Asyik aku je amek gambar kau! Kite pon nak! "

Fine Haiqal fine.

Guess they really wanted their moments.

Easy there tiger.

"Kay Sof last last! "

Obviously, I was cheated.

Warning eh boys. Last. Okay gewwd.

Naddy, look at them. I`m scared.

and here. My new scandal. So hemshemzz.

Aunty Sof has to go now. Before that, Teh tarik satu!

2009-07-01T23:13:00.000-07:00

Called my mother`s office just now. Was dying. Of boredom.

Me : Hi can I speak to my mother?
Mother : What is it Sofia?
Me : Hi my mother this is your daughter.
Mother : Sofia I am very busy what do you want?
Me : I just want to inform you that I am no longer working.
Mother : You told me that last night. Please don`t be a nuisance Sofia. I am very busy.
Me : Okay.

Even my mother doesn`t wish to entertain me at my bored of the bored momentz. Shiet. Piglet`s working and he hasn`t replied. My mother`s favourite dog is schooling. My father. I don`t wish to disturb him because I still want to live. I realise mother likes saying my name in any sentence she splurts. Sofia this Sofia that. Sofia Sofia Sofia and she makes it a point to speak proper english with me.

Ah yes on a absofishinglutely different note, Happy 17th Birthday Nana Safar!
I shall forever remember you for your glorious advice : Find a man not a boy. See you around and have a wondergolly birthday my no blood relation 28 days older cousin.

Peoplezz pimplezz it`s July. Of all ze days in this month, take special note of 29th. That`ll be the day your wishes will come true if you make mine happen first. Like really. Really! I said really!

2009-07-01T10:59:00.000-07:00

Suddenly I had this thought of how it could have felt to have MJ sending me to school. Well all my dad does is to flick a couple of dimes and there you go Sof your cheap fare to Yishun (read: Northland Sec) and back to Woodlands.

If MJ were to send me to school I`d prolly sweet talk him to ditch school with me. Plus not wanting to leave the bloody vehicle and just handcuff myself to his hand leg arms calves wherever. Then force him to sing and dance all hour just for me.

I don`t care. If he needs a break I`ll feed him with the dimes I have to use for my fare. With dimes you can get biscuits at Kopitiam ah whatever MJ I love you! How can someone so flawless like you die? Unacceptable!

Baby when I start school next next week please send me. Or at least since you have been procrastinating to take your license plzz plzzzzz do accompany me. First day I scared. I nervous. Later I pee how? You help me mop.

Sof stop it sia. This is 1 of my MJ moments. Ah chibai you not happy go die la for all I care. Might as well spare your worthless life to MJ who needs it because he still has yet to entertain me. Am selfish I know.

2009-06-30T10:19:00.000-07:00

Carried your bag. At a temperamental state you lighted your stick and gave me a baleful stare. I felt small. Not needed. Divided.

!W : When this ciggarette ends, something is going to end.

I kept quiet till..

!W : 3 more puffs.

I still kept quiet..

!W : My last puff, you really don`t wanna say anything?

I cried. Weeping an elusive amount of tears meant something. Because it meant a load to me. You took a step forward and let your bag down. Opened your arms and hugged me whilst I was nailed on ze seat.

I thought I was going to lose you. It was so mere. I can`t describe.

Moments ago before we hung up and exchanged night wishes, you reasoned and apologized upon your indecent act as a man as a boyfriend. Most importantly as my boyfriend.

Cheesy? Shut up bitch. I love my boyfriend. I hate his drama. I love him. I still hate his drama. Okay can I still love him v v v v v much.

2009-06-30T00:02:00.000-07:00

Turn back while you still can.

I just don`t know how ever so sorry I can feel. I cannot describe how I`m feeling. I broke your heart. Your sight isn`t for me. Your touches are not on my skin. You steps are protruding my way.

Baby you really don`t want to see me anymore is it?

2009-06-29T21:24:00.000-07:00

Think me. Think love.

Everything was last minute. Since when has thingz never been whenever I`m out with my happy boyz. Stupid fuckers are beginning to forget me as days past because of MOE. I`m going to school too. I forgot.

LJS at Causeway when piglet arrived. His first day of work couldn`t have gotten worst. Especially when you have an uncaring attention seeking heart breaking girlfriend like me. Nevertheless, we still proceeded with shisha at Haji Lane where ze rest were present.

And this little ball was looking at the 3 other ballz playing ball. Bally bally ballehhhh.

Saved his cigg. Sengket! Lewzah! Nyeh hehehheheheheheeheehehx.

This fucker again.

Hated ze lighting though it`s nice. It made me steamed. No not turned on you fool. Just in a mood to sleep and get knocked out by 2 shishas.

Nonis Randy Amin Hisap Buah Orton.

I can`t stop laughing.

I have the most bitchiest yet loveable friendzz who are constantly annoying me 24/7 for picturez. You ballz better visit my funeral and paste all my wonderful picz in my coffin when I die I warn euw ols.

!NOTE : Nonis you stewpigkk hairy nigga hurry and grab the picz at facebook. Just don`t forget to say and admit " Eh Sof thankz ah you the best and yes Istill need breastfeeding before going to bed every night. "

2009-06-29T01:02:00.000-07:00

Am secretly excited to meet piglet cause he just ended work! Plus point is my happy boyz are joining! Have yet to post something nautical.

Later. Tudaaaaaa!

2009-06-28T07:26:00.000-07:00

My life revolves around your fingertips.

My babypig came. Bought chocolate oreo ice blended! So nice! I`ll have 1 for breakfast tomorrow. Just to let you readerz know. Spent quality time with my mother`s dog (Ilyas my brother) and he left at 10pm because he `s working early tomorrow.

I hate his new job. I`ll complain more tomorrow.

See me? Shut up la you blind.

Euw are ze cutest biggest banana.

Living at the 2nd floor can be real great cause if you have an uber dramatic boyfriend, he might like singing you a song by your grill-less window.

I`ll remind you readerz again I hate piglet`s new job. Abhor! Despise! Hate! Dislike!

2009-06-28T01:16:00.000-07:00

Oh baby baby give me one more chance.

I was glued to the TV watching the tributes given to my hot hot heat MJ at MTV such that I only left home till piglet pestered me to cause ze I has promised to meet him at Bukit Panjang.

" Baby you see MJ until you don`t want to leave home? "
AHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHZZ sorry sorry strawberry. You`re talking about MJ here. MJ?! Like hello me MJ. MJ me. You know? Yes you know.

Haiqal piglet and myself spent our quality hours at Bukit Panjang yesterday. Facebook MSN You-tube and some dumb car crash game !W likes playing. Ah boys. Boyzzzz. Anyways we were at Starbucks. Kopi Jantan satu!

At night I was supposed to meet my happy boys at Bottle Tree. Sorry guys adult fare. My card`s out of value. You student fare riderz zip it. Stop being annoying! Zip!

Kopi Jantan never tasted so geeewd.

As for today it`s home stay. Home stay`s fun once in a while. A small while. But I hate home stay be it once in while twice in a while or any while. I can cry and roll in bed complaining about how bored I get and how itching my gigundo ass can get.

I hate staying at home! Home hates me staying in it! Unproductive indestructive boredom!

And that`s why I called my boyfriend to come over to entertain me with his DVDs and he promised to clean my smelly room for me. Bless you piglet.

2009-06-26T21:50:00.000-07:00

I wanna say something to you.

My Love Acoustic - The Sallys

My love
You're everything I could ask for
Your smile makes me happy
Your tears makes me sad
And I know for sure
This is the best feeling I ever had

Your love
Brighten my dimmest light
Make my heart beat faster than before
As days pass I'm gonna love you more
I promise

A real nice melodic song the piglet sent me. He says it expresses exactly how he feels. Finally baby no metal hard core punk whatever whatever I don`t care. I`m still not over the fact that MJ died. Jesus!

May not be identical. May not be exact. But it`s sincerely from my heart. That counts most.

2009-06-26T19:41:00.000-07:00

Because I`m a fan of Michael Jackson that`s why I woke up to messages and calls from my friends and family about his death. If you have any harsh comments you`d better die now before I explode and drag you to hell with me when I die.

My king of pop. My idol. My hot hot heat with a busted nose. I have loved hearing your songs and watching your music video. Beats porn. Beats everything. You have such a wonderful attribute and nature. I bet god is keeping you all to himself that`s why you had to leave.

I just love it when you do that pose. If any other singer or male hunk tries touching their balls like that it wouldn`t be as electrifying and sexy as how you do it.

The grim reaper must be real lucky to take your life. If the grim reaper were me I would have just let you live till doomsday for your fans and children sake. Or even better, keep you all to myself and lick your sweat day and night.

Rest in peace god bless you and he will.

2009-06-25T09:37:00.000-07:00

You`re everything I could ask for.

Skipped work. Was too tired and sick to head back. Besides school`s about to start for myself and am not really in ze mood to weighten my pockets. Know what I mean? Know? Know? Alright.

Impromptu meet up with Nonis and Haqim. Piglet joined us in ze later part and so did Aliyyah. Lunched at Banquet where we waited for Fart the pussy to come by. Asswipe was bloody punctual. Bloody fish.

Us 3. It started off with Aliyyah. If it wasn`t for her, I wouldn`t have had a babypig. Nyehe heheheheheheeez.

Sof lobang hidung maintain.

Slacked a while more for a smoke then we 6 walked to Admiralty Park. Played cards and just chilled talking about things and some stupid revolution thing. Fuck wrestling man. Shut up Nonis Randy. Go suck your father`s ballz la.

Piglet`s brother (Rozhaini) and his pal then came. Got merrier. Could have had a night picnic or something. The starz were pretty at night! So so pretty! The moon was a cresent. Romantic. Oh cheesy cheese I is so in love!

Friends till we meet again. I shall send you postcards or a DNA of my saliva. Ah whatever. Misses to pieces.

2009-06-24T10:33:00.000-07:00

Confidently just now I handed my "MC" first thing to my supervisor when I reached work.

Me : Sheena nah my MC.
Sheena : (Looks at MC)
Sheena : Eh sayang this one not MC this one receipt.
Me : Eh?! Alamak.

Now i`m searching high and low, low and high, high above the sky for my MC. Crap. I can`t find it. Die x 6 x 10^23.

2009-06-23T10:14:00.000-07:00

You`re a post-it on my life wall.

AAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH heart you ^^v!

4 to 11 shift tomorrow. Haven`t you heard that I`m resigning soon. By 7th. Likely-able? Reason being school`s about to start for me. 13th July. 13th for christ sake?! My 4th month with piglet. Now he has to wish me happy 4th and at the same time Happy 1st day of school.

Wonderful just fucken wonder-full-of-shiet.

2009-06-23T09:09:00.000-07:00

Don`t you ever forget.

TOLD EUW I GORT A NEW LENSE BITCHIEZ! Yey yey! Hurrah hurray! But this lense suckz. It takes long ranges. Ah pork balls.

So how was my Tuesday?

Before I left home for my day-out with piglet, I left a note for Ilyas since it was his 12th birthday.

Piglet and I spent our day buying food and snacks at Sheng Shiong. Best! We pratically looked as if we were going for a party. When actually we just fancied the stuffz there. Cheap shiet! Then we headed for a settle down.

DVDs piglet rented ze other day for me. Monster Inc! Monster Inc you know! I know!

At about 8pm piglet and I headed to my place for Ilyas`s mini birthday celebration. Food wasn`t that monumetal or glorious cause it was last minute.

Fucker.

The Zin(s).

Happy birthday fatfuck! Stop being annoying. Stop killing me inside out. Stop stealing my food. Stop taking so much space in this house. Stop spoiling my thingzz. Stop it stop! Okay bitch? Ilyas Syamil happy birthday study hard play soft. PSLE la bodoh.

2009-06-19T21:52:00.000-07:00

Keeping all the love.

1) Pay`s in by tonight! Tonight I say! Tew-nitez!
2) My boyfriend can be a bitch sometimes. (Forgiven)
3) Not working today and tomorrow.
4) Babypig has a match tomorrow.
5) Meeting him later after he finishes work.
6) Then off we are to my family reunion. Gewwwd fewwwd!
7) I ate 3 burgers 1 large fries but I still have 3 pratas to finish.
8) Rokok status : 8 batang.
9) Fart the pussy is coming back from M'sia today!
10) Yasin actually prays. AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHX.
11) Mike called me during work just to say he missed me. Awwwwwhzzz.
12) Piglet wants me to transfer malay songs to his MP3.
13) Malay songs?
14) Malay songssss?!!
15) Are you kidding me?

I know it sucks to not have pictures up in my posts. Don`t blame me. Blame my mother`s favourite dog. Chop his fingers for dropping my camera and burn his fats. I`ll spare you my lighter. Okay? Alright! Set! If lighter not effective enough I give you my whole stove.

2009-06-17T20:44:00.000-07:00

Congratulations you won.

I can love you with all my might but at the same time I can feel so disappointed in you such that I just think I lost my mojo to try and resparkle things.

2009-06-17T09:28:00.000-07:00

ILYAS SYAMIL BIN MOHAMED ZIN/ my mother`s favourite dog, you broke my camera lense. You dropped my DSLR.

Now I will patiently wait for you to wake up and break your face for touching my things without my permission. Furthermore mother is blaming me for misplacing my things here and there and not even putting fault at you a wee bit.

Interesting. You face will be too.

2009-06-16T21:15:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was so bored that I started playing scissors paper stones with Yasin online. Fucken lame but worth the 5 seconds. Chatted whilst checking facebook.

Oh yes our dear pussylove has left for Malaysia this morning. Farewell Fart don`t crash and die. Crash and live okay? Okay awesome! We love you arab puss puss puss!

Fart : Aku rindu kau sia!
Me : Aku pon. Eh eh aku dye rambut aku tau!
Fart : Ahaha kau jadi siamang pe skarang?
Me : Siamang tu Abbas bodoh.

Kahneenahbeychaocheebhai kau Fart bin Abbas! Ahahahaaa amek kau babi!

Workingzz later till 10pm. Should I extend till 11pm? Mmmm.. Ah yes !W was on his way to Woodlands just now when I told him I changed my mind about having brunch together. Sorry sorry strawberry!

2009-06-15T10:04:00.000-07:00

Where you can stay for as long.

Imagine. Something sweet/ sweeter/ as sweet every single day without fail. No don`t come telling me you`ll get bored of it girls and boys. You can jolly well lick my toilet seat for lying too impulsively.

2009-06-15T09:22:00.000-07:00

They say you`ll change when the sun falls down.

Off day. Once again a day with my relatives over at Sengkang. This time a wee bit merrier cause my cousin Amalina and her little brother, Harith, came for a visit as well. Harith is uber adorable.

Talked to Amalina. Updated story-told and chanted about our precious private lives. Gear up for O`s kay Ina? O.K? K.O? Don`t K.O okay! Good!

Harith : Kak! Harith cicak boy.
Me : Okay. Can.
Harith : Harith cicak boy!
Me : Okay sayang.
Harith : Okay siape?
Me : Harith la.
Harith : Harith cicak boy la bukan sayang.

Oh the enthusiastic yet heart-burning side of little adorable chatterboxes.

Aina. She got bored whilst waiting for her mother to finish her hair cut.

Same goes for Shafiqah.

Dyed my hair burgundy brown. Streaks of ember here and there but no at all that obvious. Loving it actually! Alordz lor!

At the same time I was complaining about why ze babypig wouldn`t message me during ze evening. Suckx you know! He was happily goofing around at the football court while I had to live with a stiff highlighted head for 30 minutes.

Piglet! How. Could. Euww.

2009-06-13T21:24:00.000-07:00

I was rudely awakened by my phone. But it all roots to piglet since he`s the one who just had to call me early in ze morning.

At 8.45am

!W : Today go where?
Me : Go where?
!W : Baby I thought you plan?
Me : Eh? Alamak I forgot ah.
!W : Ai yo! You ni eh slalu macam ni.
Me : Eheheheheheheeeeheh sorry lor.

Then at 10.02am

!W : Where you?
Me : In bed.
!W : Wake up! I da siap tau.
Me : Okay good for you. Want award?
!W : Tsk. Where`s my baby who`s always telling me to be punctual?
Me : In bed and heading back to sleep.

Then at 12.25pm

!W : Please tell me you da siap.
Me : Da.
!W : Bagus.
Me : Siap makan je.

I am very bonus. Told you you`ll go to heaven piglet.

2009-06-13T09:07:00.000-07:00

Nurizuan Oi!

Love

You!

Like what I`ve always said :
" Baby if you die in a state as my boyfriend. You will sure go heaven one. Cause you very patient with me. "

You`ve been a major amazement in my stale stagnant life. We`ve been through alot. Fights? Standard eh baby? We arr gangstaz in lurbbb wuddd! Ahahahaaahaha okay stop.

I`m not going to go too cheesy and start lifting your heavy balls like hell though I wish to do so. But as far as I Soffey ze awesome is concerned, I lalalove you more than 70% discounts at Cotton On/ F21 or even Bubble Tea!

Happy 3 months my loveling baby pig. Licks face!

2009-06-11T22:24:00.000-07:00

Sid* : Basket. PM mintak kene terajang sia.
Me : Facts Sid facts.

Oh and anyways there`s a new promotion for Pizza Hut DELIVERY. Fuckers I said delivery so don`t go dining in asking about this promo. Don`t be stupider than how you already are plzz? Yes so the promo consists of a personal pan pizza + 4 honey roasted wings + a sub sandwhich.

Eye reeypeet HOT SUB san-weetch! Joel (my subway partner) you heard me I heard you. Let`s go! Oh no we can`t meet. I still owe you 2 episodes of friends DVD. You`d prolly kill me. Eheh heh hehehheeehehhex!

By ze way Muslimzz, don`t worry it`s halal cause it`s not really subway.
It`s hot sub. I is loving it many many.

2009-06-10T21:02:00.000-07:00

Even if you`re far it feels close.

Sorry I`ve been neglecting my blog these few days. I is very hairy busy. Very very! With work. Imagine coming home 1am every day and only waking up when the sun`s right on top your scalp. I barely rise earlier than 12 noon. Not lying.

But yesterday was an exception since I made plans with my 2 grrlzzz for a catch-up session over at Nerdlove`s place. Haven`t seen them in ages. They look so hot. So slim. I can turn into a lesbian any time.

They brought nuggets and finger food. I brought my stomach.

If I had a penis, I would have laughed till it falls off.

Part of Nerd`s agenda book.

Eww. Pink. Ewwwwwwwwwwww!

Nerd : Popular is rich because of me.
Me : Why?
Nerd : Look at all the stuffs I buy when I`m bored!

Unnecessary item #11.

Made a move at about 1 since I`m working at 4 later that day. Piglet picked me up from ze park nearby and accompanied me home when I was dilly-dallying to get dressed. Don`t blame me. I come from a specie called females.

Tomorrow is Friday! Friday means working morning shift till 4pm. What`s best is after that I`m having planzz with my 2 homosexualz. Yasin and Fart! If ze plan fails you both die. Die I tell you.

2009-06-06T23:54:00.000-07:00

Being my element.

I mentioned about being late. I wasn`t. Infact I was very hairy merry late. My apologies piglet. Afterwhich we immediately had lunch at LJS. Baby feeded me worth $30 of it. Amek kau Sof!

Oh and piglet got his haircut! Happy happy! He looked neater but that stewpigk barber chopped his hair a little too thin and his tail is practically gone. Barber you deserve to die. Ze cutest yet sweetest thing was that baby even apologized to me because he thought his haircut wasn`t to my expectation. Shooo cutezz!

In any case at Plaza Singapura, Hidayat joined us so instead of a me and piglet day, it was a me piglet and father pig day. Eheh heehehehehhhehehehhhehhhez no offense Yat.

Then went to watch Monster vs. Aliens after a heavy nifty lunch at LJS. Movie was average but funny at most of ze parts. It ended at about 7.45 thence we met Syawal over at Flyers to chillax.

Was tempted to eat Popeyes but it was getting pretty late. Supperz make me sleepy. Very hairy sleepy.

Fairer cuter. Nurizuan what happened over ze years?!

!W : Aku nak naik flyer. Belum naik naik sia.
Wal : Kau naik fun fair nye ah.
Yat : Jgn Wan. Tak ternaik nanti.
!W : Eh at least aku naik ade gerak sia. Dari kau!
Me : Ahahhhahahax!

My very own Mat Rape.

Great day! I heart my boyfriend! Got problem? Got problem rot in hell. Plzz. Now. I said now!

2009-06-06T21:39:00.000-07:00

15 minutes ago my boyfriend just boarded ze train heading for Admiralty already. It takes him at the very least 20 minutes to get here. As for the awesome, she`s still blogging. Not ready to head the showerz not ready to lift her heavy ass and definitely not ready to dress up.

Baby make sure your phone`s MP3`s working. I might take quite a while.
Oh jesus!

Fuck your earpiece is with me.
(Sorry sorry strawberry!)

2009-06-05T10:07:00.000-07:00

Leave on what`s hanging at that side.

Eww eww eww! Piglet`s pay`s more than me! Double eww! No fair! I is so not liking this. But anyways tomorrow I`m meeting him for our Satur-date! Am excited because the I has been craving for LJS. Don`t laugh at me fool I don`t have all ze time in this bloody world to choose where to eat conviniently okay.

Today :
1) Took MC.
2) Piglet and I wanted to meet but decided to spend time with our own families instead.
3) Hence I watch Hannah Montanawhatevershiet with my familia.
4) Loved ze songs.
5) Hated the show.

Dinner was at airport`s swensens. Had beef frank hot dog mushroom soup fries prawn dipperzz spaghetti half a burger and a portion of kway teow. All good for a month`s feed. I can barely breathe now. But that doesn`t mean I`m skipping LJS tomorrow. Baby you promise me!

You break promise I break your heart. (By being xxxtra sulky nak mampos) Don`t like right? Ah don`t like then don`t do. Gewwwwd piglet eye lauff euw.

Oh yes, I`ve got a family gathering over at Pasir Ris chalet tomorrow night. More food. Damn! I don`t want to grow any fatter. Nurizuan I know you`d die to go for the food there. I just know. Don`t argue with me I just know.

2009-06-04T11:07:00.000-07:00

Baby they don`t know where this is going.

Went to work with ze worst menstrual cramp ever! Fuck! Pain like hell. No. Hell like pain. Okay. But ze sweetest thing was this piglet here got me my daily-needed bubble tea. Taking his delicious cooking as a bonus point, he cooked me fried maggi with cheese for dinner break during work! I suka sekali you!

I don`t feel like heading for work tomorrow. Am freaking lazy and tired. Do you know how tired and exhausted I am? You don`t know right? So now that you know, good. Pay`s here. I don`t think I`d be getting a heap cause I was absent for work for nearly a week that time.

Suckz ballzz.

2009-06-03T22:46:00.000-07:00

Tell me tell me what I`ve been longing to hear.

" Your laughter, my joy.

Your tears, my sorrow.
Your love, my everything.
My love for you, irreplacable. "

You amaze me with the way you tolerate me now. I must must be ze luckiest girl in this damned world. No kidding. You`re a prized possession that deserves just a wee bit more of polishing to hit perfection.

2009-06-01T22:47:00.000-07:00

I`ll tell you exactly what`s in my heart.

At 11.30am baby reached Admiralty and waited for my majestic arrival over at ze Supermarket there. My home`s barely a 5 minute walk and he who came from Bukit Panjang was on time. Veri hairy proud of you!

My dad bought us ingredients for our cooking earlier but there were things we needed to add so we bought the remaining stuffz and of course ze mostest important ingredient to any outing. Rokok. Okay ahahahaaahahahz.

I made tuna sandwiches with mayo and cheeeeeze!
Yes simple dish. Fuck la don`t laugh.

Never trust a skinny chef. So baby I really wreeelly trust euw!

Piglet did all ze cooking and cleaning up. I sat and talked and sat and talked. Me boyfriend`s awesome! Left my place at about 2pm and reached Botanicals at aprrox 3-ish. Set our mat and the sun was blazing like shiet till 4! I`m not complaining however once again, just a thought okay god?

Pasta sauces! Mine neapolitan with xxxxtra cheese. His alfredo with no xtra. But he had extra hot dogs. Loser.

Food was srumptious. My boyfriend can cook. My boyfriend cooks well. My boyfriend shall and must cook in our future pig-nics. Must must!

We have had enough arguments for ze past weeks. I`m sorry you had to find things out ze hard way. I just can`t wait to see you later at work and tell you how sorry, appreciative, grateful and blessed I feel to be with you. I`m not saying this for lifting-balls sake piglet, I mean every word.

I`m sorry. My heart`s your and yours only.

2009-05-31T23:08:00.000-07:00

Crumbling pieces of joy.

!W : Oi jangan kacau matair aku.
Hidayat : Asal? Aku main main je pe. Sof bukannye tak biasa.
!W : Jangan kau. Die tengah uzur. Aku sendiri tak berani.

At the point of time when I heard him say that, I was already giggling in my heart. Tahu pun takut dengan aku eh Nurizuan! Nyeh heh heheheeeheehhehhehehehehzz.

2009-05-31T09:38:00.000-07:00

I don`t know what we`re after.

Hi! Goodbye weekends. Today work was..

Customer : Pizza hut got pork?
Me : No sir. It`s all halal.
Customer : Why no pork? Pork very nice.
Me : Ya too nice until got swine flu.

Yes I said that. Thank goodness ze customer thought I was joking. Son of a bitch. It`s pizza hut not pork hut. Stupid swine.

Well anyways keeping all those irony aside, tomorrow is my day off! Planned for a picnic with my babypig over at Botanical Gardens/ Sentosa. Sexcited know! It`s been a long time since I headed both places.

Hidayat made me so ticked today. He wouldn`t shut up. His mouth is bigger than his ass. Sorry I`m not mocking you okay Yat but you should learn to zip that hole before I shove it with something bigger than your ass. Being mad resulted to me cursing non-stop infront of I punya boyfriend who is now (abnormally but thankfully) extremely patient.

I`m loosing thick slabs of dirty blood at the same time my cramps are flipping my temper over. Do understand.

2009-05-30T09:15:00.000-07:00

Keeping a part of you here.

After being woken up several times by !W, I finally managed to peel my weighty eyes open and got ready quick to meet the rest. Firstly present were Mat Qarl and Hartini. Met at Woodlands and took 966 to Marine Parade. The drizzle there really sucked! (Sorry god that was just a minor opinion)

Candid to ze supreme fucken funny.

Fucker I`m not modelling okay.

Not long one after another came. Haqim Suraden Nonis then finally Yasin and Double D. Bastards don`t know ze meaning of punctuality. Yes I called you all bastards. Lovely bastards.

Watched the guyz foolishly toss one another in ze sand and water. Ah yes Haqim found mussels and he literally cooked it with a lighter and ate it there and then. Suprise suprise he`s still alive! Wuh-how!

For once during outingz like these, I departed early. I have curfews now. Seriously I am kidding you. Fool. As aforementioned, I left since I had to attend a family occasion in commemorate of me mother`s belated birthday. Friends, eye mist eww!

2009-05-29T13:17:00.000-07:00

To my mother,
H A P P Y birthday !

Though I can never really understand you and vice versa, you`ll always be my mother. Being a mother you never fail to nurture me and have me guided with ze best possible ways. God shall and must bring you to heaven.

Hi god. Thankz. I love my mother.

On ze other hand..

Beach outing tomorrow with the cluster of jokers! Baby`s appointed to wake me up on time since I have to meet them at 9am. Morning! That I can`t really trust myself. Cause just so you know, it`s nearly 5am now.

2009-05-28T23:41:00.000-07:00

Till it`s over-loved.

At the very least 6 packets of chilli, tartar/ mayo. Even for 1 bloody packet of fries. For BK don`t forget BBQ sauce. For LJS never leave the cheeze out. For Mc D`s curry sauce eh! Standard Sof.

Presenting my (forever and ever and ever) hungry piglet.

Wednesday. Walked along Bugis street thru and fro. Bought a dress and a shirt which practically got me smiling for earhole to earhole. 70% of for Topman! Dorothy Perkins! Cotton On! Absofuckinglutely interesting.

Once my mild shopping was done I hovered over to Cathay to meet ze Abang Body who at that point of time was 10 minutes late. Not only that he could still show a priceless smile while flaunting his way to me.

In anycase we bought tickets for A night at the museum 2. Our show was at 9.55pm and we wasted 2 hours letting by him have his dinner and me for my post-shopping activity which was : to shop somemore. Ahahaahaaah. Bought Cotton On`s shirt and skirt! Very very hap-pee!

The show was fucken hilarious! Totally worth every single penny! Don`t be stupid and miss it, stupid. Go fork out $7.50 for it! Go! Go la! Anyways so by ze time our movie ended it was nearly 12 and we both rushed our way for ze last train. Hallelujah we felt like champions!

I`m working tomorrow. 11am to 4pm. Then planning for a 2nd round spree with my workmate and boyfriend! Dinner at popeye`s tomorrow! A must okay babies? Say okay. Good.

2009-05-28T22:12:00.000-07:00

He`s happy hysterical.

" I`ve been a jerk. All I want to do now is to beg for your apology and win your heart back. I`m very sorry baby. I`m very very sorry. Please don`t leave me. "

2009-05-26T11:32:00.000-07:00

Sometimes you have to lose.

So if you want to call me bodoh you can jolly well eat facebook`s shit. NUS! Facebook I`m hearting euw! You motivate me and I feel so academically enlightened.

It`s 3am. My eyes are wide open like a toilet seat without a cover. At this very hour I want to go shopping. Okay I shall stop. Working at 4 to 11pm later on. Wednesday off! Plans with Abang Body! Yey!

By ze way.

You should stop marching with ze dicks (stop reading my blog) if you are :

1. Too matured.
2. A staunge/ strong believer of your religion.
3. Not open minded.
4. Just coming her to slut around/ plagarize.
5. Trying too hard to cyberfuck my life.

Because I`ve had enough about what people have to say. I`ve said this but I shall say it again to you pathetic dumbells to make it crystal clear that this blog is for ze general. You read you know you shut up. I didn`t say if you don`t read you`re gonna die virgin.

2009-05-25T23:52:00.000-07:00

Let`s conspice then ignite.

Making it a point to visit my other folks at Sengkang during my off days, I did so. Talked alot with my happening aunt and talking to her makes me feel lighter. Meaning the burden and problems the I is currently facing.

At the same time I miss my cousins from her side. Amalina! Kak Meera! I want to go out with you guys. June holidays? Pwetty pwetty plz!

Oh yeah. Look at what Hairi did to my foot! I was slicing a cake when he just poked me at my hip. The knife fell at that smacking area. Hairi you bitch better die now. Warning, not later but now.

Hi meet my loveling! (lover + darling) This is Sam. Sir name is Sung.

Nurizuan I think you`re bringing that issue way out of hand. You`re getting ticked at my slightest mistake. I don`t know whatelse to say since saying and expressing it means nothing to you anymore.

I want my life back. The life when I don`t have to abide to too many rules. I don`t feel 17 because of you. I`m feeling chained to a sack of pain.

I want to unchain myself. Can?

2009-05-25T23:10:00.000-07:00

You made me love you.

Berokz! I`m secretly excited to meet you. Okay I don`t think it`ll be a secret after you`ve read this. Nonetheless I missed euw berokz! Kay la kay la Abang Body.

Work wasn`t that bad yesterday. I had a good (plus hard) time helping a new comer who was seated beside me. She`s an old lady. Eh I`m not mocking her! Shut up! So as I was saying she was really blur and half ze time I was helping her answer her callz.

But the sweetest things was before her shift ended she limped her way to ze vending machine outside and got me a can of soya bean. Awwh! Nenekz gua cinta sama lu!

!W was off yesterday which led me to going home with the usualz. Elfie and Hidayat. This time Helmi was around. By ze way thanks Elfie for that chin-up message. I`ll heed your advice. I promise you I`ll remind god to grant you a hot caring indon girlfriend quick mmkays!

Hartini cheer up! I`m here. Your IKEA partner. We`ll bomb that shelter some day okay ibu? Oh and Double D don`t be sad. I still want you to be my bestfriend-in-law. Hafizah! Dengar tak? Eheh heh heh hehe hehehehehehehheheehx.

I have my own set of problemz. Abang Body and friends you all must help me okay? Okay! Best! Good! Excellent! Fantastic! Bye.

2009-05-23T23:56:00.000-07:00

Steady here we go.

My wallet is as fat as a fat. My heart is full and so are my lungs. Corroded with tar and nicotine. GSS is kam-beng (coming)! Let`s hurrah hurray!

Great Singapore Sale means :

1. A new bag.
2. Shirts.
3. A watch.
4. Movie (Up!).
5. Eat popeyes.
6. By a 1GB micro SD memory card for me new phone.
7. Slipperz. (This time like it or not I wanna buy Animal ah!)

But first I have to put aside money for my mother father and grandparents. Oi don`t laugh la chibai. I mean it okay! I love my grandparents so I`ll give them a small share of my pay. If my great grandparents are still around I`d prolly not give them money but just buy them a casket each.

Ah now then can laugh bodoh.

2009-05-23T19:41:00.000-07:00

You`re a weakening battery.

I love cooking even after 99% of my consumers died of kidney failure after eating my dishes. Okay no! They didn`t die. They just complain. Then they die. Yes I am kidding. Jangan tension la.

Fuck la Sof working later at 5 to 11. Chibai weak siolz.

2009-05-22T10:45:00.000-07:00

Someone who can take my hand.

Someday, I`ll quit. I said someday. Sum-deyh. So don`t force me thankzz euw.

1. Mother`s birthday is on this coming 29th. Should I think of a surprise or should she think of a surprise for me?

2. Happy belated birthday Nonis Randeh Amin. Orton can suck cock! Love you have a great 17th!

3. Nonis Qarl Yasin Haqim Mimi Mat Suraden Double D Harris! I had an awesome time with you guys. Looking forward to meet you all again! I miss you all already! This applies to ze rest who have been long silent. I`ll get you mofos for this.

4. Starting work as usual the coming week. Shit fuck fuck shit.

5. Hi my hot berok I miss you.

6. We`re both having touch screen phones! Kewlz I love! Alot!

2009-05-21T06:50:00.000-07:00

My whole world could cave in for you.

I had a choice just now. A laptop or a phone. I chose a phone. Why? Because I is very hairy impatient to get a new phone as soon! My stinking Sony Ericsson has been dying on me half ze time despite countless repairs.

Now I don`t need you Sony so off you go to ze bin. Hi Samsung I`m loving you already I promise to stay loyal to you and I won`t cheat on you. Sony you can lick my rabbit`s balls clean.

Tomorrow I shall pray to god. Don`t ask me why or what for. You tell me what do you pray for then maybe if I`m not disgusted by your face I might just answer you honestly. Orelse you can join Sony and lick my rabbit`s balls. Good.

That`ll be one heck of a favour. Ah yes my pay`s here already. Am tired to decribe how rich and heavy my pockets feel now so I`ll just doze off for this moment. I love you all nightz wet sticky dreams!

2009-05-20T06:26:00.000-07:00

I love you and I shall be true.

" If you love me, tell me. If you don`t, gently let me go. "
and just so you know, this is roughly how much you mean to me.

Great to have you back. Just don`t leave (again).
You promised.

2009-05-20T03:40:00.000-07:00

Build a wall around my heart.

Me is not working. I am not working this week except weekends. Now I`ll get that paranoid feeling when my precious precious weekends get burnt by uncouth pizza-craving pineholes out there. You bloody irritants. God better bless you cause I`d be lucifer cursing the shit out of you homos(sapiens).

Thence with ze oppurtunity of off days I decided to clean my room and do a little investigatory work with the dirty disgusting organisms that have been secretly seeing me change/ sleep/ nude/ cry/ laugh in my room. Hallelujah there aren`t any! Now me room ish spick and spanz!

Some of my undone vandalisms on my innocent room wall. I`m sorry wall no.2. Yeah I number my walls. Zip it okays!

Whilst clearing, I found a note. A note that was due last year March. Nerdlove passed it to me cause I still remembered I was going through a very hairy emotional phase. Just don`t call me emo now I`d prolly kick you in the groine.

You guys must really be wondering who that jerk is right? Right! I know I`m right.

Nerdlove I still have part of your pinky belongings with me. I still vividly remember that that`s the pen you borrowed me for my A-Maths prelims last year September. That clip was for you to clip my last minute Maths homework.

Till now I haven`t returned them but I`m sure you still love me right? Thanks I is loving you too!

Then here`s a choir score that I owe Mr.Sim. I really hope he totally forgot about it. Eheh heh!

Musician and composers are just suckers (except for Michael Jackson of course!). If you understand this you`re prolly one of the suckers but don`t take it too hard. You`re a rocking sucker for being a reader here. I mean it! Please be honoured.

Give it another week, my room might be a home for mould and fungi.
Eww! Eww! But cooliozzz!

2009-05-17T23:34:00.000-07:00

I sniff the jacket and I could smell your cologne simultaneously thinking of you.
No actually I don`t need the jacket to think of you, you`re glued to my thoughts already.

I don`t know how but I know why.
Mmm tell me, does it happen to you too?

On a totally different but sincere note,
happy birthday Elfie! Best wishes!

2009-05-17T21:25:00.000-07:00

Teach me how and why.

I`m taking MC today. Don`t say swine flu you swine! I don`t eat pork okay! Pork doesn`t eat me either! Shut up!

Remember the book that I was reading on? The one that I`m horrifically hooked with? Ah yes this one. It`s all about law and crime and how such a magnificient well-distinguished man like him stories about his life into becoming who he is today.

What`s bonus is the inside pointers about his views of certain crimes. Like the very vivid and serial ones for instance the Huang Na rape and murder. This book is brilliant and brillant is this book.

Subhas you may not be hemshem like how Bollywood heroes should always be but no worries are me hero!

2009-05-16T20:49:00.000-07:00

Fly with me and leave this place to their hands.

Agenda was to stick my heavy metal ass at home and start licking my toilet tiles till their clean but thank goodness I have an arabian pussy who knows exactly when to rescue me out of my boredom couch. Bahek ah Fart!

Within 3 hours at IMM and also with ze aid of an awesome shopping buddy like me (okay thank you!) we managed to round up a couple of necessities. Ah yes my pussy is such an adorable one, he treated me to lunch and also got me a hoodie. Hoodie was by deal eh puss?

Arabians are bloody show offz.

Once shopping was all done. Fart and I met !W and Hanafi over at Bukit Panjang Plaza. Not long after, we 4 sprawled over to Hanafi`s place where Fart, !W and myself entertained ourselves with his gracious collection of Samurai swords. Fart cooliozz kan kan!

Initally we wanted to leave at 8 but we got too caught up with the fascinations of Hanafi`s collection that we decided by 9 tops. However to our utter dismay, we only took ze bus at 10.15pm.

Fart we are so kewlzsxzsxx and punctual.

2009-05-16T19:47:00.000-07:00

Seriously I don`t know what the fuck is wrong with you people.

I have such fantastic readers. So fantastic that they get uberly caring. When they do, they`ll start taking care of business for you (even if it means your relationship see how caring they get! Woah!). It amazes me to a MONUMENTAL extend how you can actually abide to such orders of printing information from my blog. Making it a fresh port of critique for someonelse.

You know, you really didn`t have to do this. Unless if you were spelt under a sneer cast of slavery. That I don`t know but being humane you could have chose to mind your own business and piss off.

What I rant in my blog is what I want to say in my blog. It may be too detailed and gnarly for some of you holistical angelicans. Sorry if you don`t like reading it then don`t read it. No pressure no stress. I didn`t say if you don`t read you`re gonna be virgin forever. Did I or did I not? I did not mmmkayzz!

So you think you know me inside out for all my 17 dreading years of living on this scarce surface after reading a few chapters of my blog is it? Then why in hell God wouldn`t have simplifed us all into microchips and html codes? Life would have been easier and speedier don`t you think? Think hard no think harder.

Nonetheless thanks for the intense concern of going through the hassle and tussle of leaking inevident scoops from my blog. Bravo la sangat you people.

2009-05-15T07:56:00.000-07:00

For the first and the last.

I`m glad work ended at 4pm today. God knew how relieved I was the minute I clocked out. Babypig and I then headed to Orchard, resuming to our plans. Which was to meet my familia for dinner after not seeing them for quite some time.

Dinner was at Swensen`s and now I can be labeled as mother of pig okay? You should have seen my stomach. Terriblur rabrakzz you! My family was feeding me endlessly because they were complaining about how haggard I looked like. Please I`m no hippy. I don`t look like one. I look like a happy. A happy 24 hr weed sucking hew-man.

AJ`s filled with new tasks.

1) Clean my room.
2) ~~Get piglet to go for a haircut.~~
3) Register for my private diplomas.
4) Refill my rokok.
5) Finish reading up ze book.

Anytime soon I shall story tell a little more about the book that I`m currently hooked up with. Keeps me away from ciggarettes actually. The wonders of law and crime. Hint! Hint! Lawyer, yes! Liar, fuck you!

2009-05-13T10:41:00.000-07:00

Tenderly gently lovingly hold me.

Goodbye Sketcha (my sketchbook) and hello AJ (my new notebook). Initally I wanted another sketchbook since Sketcha was full and filled with nuisance but this little baby caught my utmost attention at that bookstore.

A split second and also nasty deco for ze first page. Ugly I know! Eh at least better than yours mmmkay! Act demoralised please.

So I was doodling and scrapping all my thoughts for ze upcoming week. My plans with whoever and wherever. Inclusive my work roster. Busy woman me know. !W was beside me looking at what I was jotting till he looked at his wrist watch and took the book away from me. By that time it was 12am.

Me : Eh! I writing know.
!W : Wait la baby. I also want to write something.
Me : What can be so important that you have to write here?
!W : Very important. Trust me. Don`t peek.

I didn`t peek. I was expecting something nonsensical like his very classical master pieces of stickmen and cars. But jeng jeng jeng..

Me : Awwh. But know something?
!W : What?
Me : Your writing sucks and why got cancel cancel there?
!W : I tried being creative.
Me : Ahaha and once again, you failed.
!W : Doesn`t matter. Happy 2 months I love you.

Very hairy sweet but it could have been much romantic and memorable if we weren`t in a packed bus on a literally bumpy home road. Happy 2 months piglet!

2009-05-12T10:23:00.000-07:00

I received a call while I was about to leave home to attend to my plans with ze babypig since we`re both starting work at 4pm today. But it was due to that call which rushed me to TTSH speedily at the same time throwing my plans away because a friend of mine was admitted.

We might fight and be at the worst terms ever over a dumb misunderstanding. You`re still at the very least someone I care. I came. Why? Cause I was worried.

So Ain, get well soon. Best wishes and take care babe. We`ll catch up real soon (:

2009-05-11T20:22:00.000-07:00

Don`t you know there`s nobody left to kiss me goodnight?

"It`s not you. It`s never you, it`s me. I don`t know if I should stay and feel all the guilt eating me inside out or just go and allow you to move on with your life. Maybe you`ll find someone better."

Last night I realised the importance of you. How empty I felt when you bust a move that killed me deep. But if you can withstand and forgive me for my countless mistakes and flaws, what makes you think I`m not gonna forgive you just for that 1 silly mistake of yours?

Don`t be so hard on yourself my little piglet. Your owner still loves care and misses you terribly.

(extended)

Things between me and !W`s been quite rocky but after a long talk last night, the hatchets are finally coming to an end and things are falling back in place.

As usual we talked and exceptionally last night, we starting exchanging kisses through ze phone. Cheesy I know! Well that`s a rare occasion for myself since I`m not a real fan of flying kisses. In anycase baby was playing his PSP`s Fifa Manager whilst hearing me sing at the other side and as usual I get to choose how many he`s suppose to score for his managing team, Chelsea.

Let`s sidetrack for a moment. Did I tell you how much I love Kaka from AC Milan/ Brazil? Yes that absofuckinglutely handsome charming charismatic talented son of a gun?! Well, since baby bought Kaka in his managing team I`m always telling him that only Kaka can score and no onelse. Yes I`m biased because I love Kaka! You shut up!

So yesterday I said I only wanted 7 goals. 3 before half time and another 4 after half time.

!W : If I can abide to them all it shows how much I love you.
Me : Mmkays can.
!W : But can I score more if I have the chance to?
Me : No I want the last score to be on the 87th minute.
!W : Ha?! Okay anything for my baby.

Ahaha!

2009-05-10T20:35:00.000-07:00

You`ve always been there.

Hi mothers. On behalf of all the stranded and wasted teenagers sprawling on this Earth`s surface, I`d like to wish you sophisticated women Happy Mother`s Day.

God bless you people for having strong pussies. No I mean it. If it weren`t for them, we teens wouldn`t be causing mayhem and love here and there till today.
(:

2009-05-08T10:44:00.000-07:00

Hi my name is Soffey!
My new e-mail is soexschemella@hotmail.com

Add me and you`ll find the girl/ boy that you love sleeping beside you. If he/ she isn`t beside you it means that you could have prolly scared him/ her while sleeping.

Don`t worry there`s always a next time.
Just add me spankz euuws!

2009-05-08T09:29:00.000-07:00

Turn, tell and feel me for all you can.

Hello mortals today was well spent with my relatives. My pesky little brat cousin Najwa is so adorable cause she was jumpy and jovial when she saw me. At least someone misses me. Even a 3 year old knows how to miss me. Me fweel sho touchzz.

"Najwa make stupid face."

"Najwa dig your nose."

"Najwa jump."
It`s fun educating ze young.

Afterwhich I met !W over at Tampines and walked about Courts Mega-store. Suprising thing is that I didn`t head over to IKEA. Jesus I miss that place. Hartini! Qarl! Nyeh hehehe.

Once we were done with walking aimlessly, we met Hanafi and Kak Zul at Tampines Mall for dinner at Pastamania. Food was alright though those 2 nearly finished all ze salt pepper tobasco sauce served on our table. Hardcore.

Went home but had to detour through Yishun first since the fucken bus to Woodlands (969) was uber packed. Assholez Singaporeans. Nevermind I`m one of you guyz actually.

Oh have you heard Mas Selamat`s captured? Selamat la S'pore skarang. Happy ah SR Nathan? Happy ah? Happy beb.

2009-05-07T23:43:00.000-07:00

I must stick within your circumference.

Hello tomorrow me love you because me not working and I`ve planned to head over to Sengkang first thing to see my long lost relatives! Very hairy excited know! Okay! Can! Stop.

So this week`s been slightly better. Quick short slacks with !W`s neighbourhood friends. I like Sofi. Why? Cause he has (nearly) the same name as mine. Cooliozz me know! Then there`s Alisha, Hanafi, Kak Zul and Wan. Another Wan not my Wan.

Plus there`s Kak Sally and Durga who I knew from work. Nice people. Kak Sally`s always giving me sweets and helping me with retarded callerzz. I like I love I suka skali la you!

My mother, aunt and uncle has left for Penang just now afternoon. Boo! I initially thought of going for dinner with them tomorrow night, along with ze babypig. Oh well guess it`s down to us 2 then.

Oh yes babypig dear please don`t forget to feed your owner/ girlfriend tomorrow since you`re re-riched again. Oink you love you oink oink oink! Hachoo! Oh hor swine flu. Habes.

Ahahahaahaha heart you kay bye.

2009-05-03T10:29:00.000-07:00

Say hello to arab`s motherpussy. Farhat came over to my area for a short meet-up. Golly I miss that pussy! Started choking on nonsensical topics and was expecting the other dickweed to turn up but too bad he`s busy flirting with I don`t know which grrl ( lost count ahx ). Tsk Yasin Yasin!

The gajah smile. Ahahahaaaaa.

Good luck to my dear pussy with school. Start shaving okay. See you arabian corndog!
Take care.

2009-05-02T22:32:00.000-07:00

Relight my dying flame.

I should reconsider making this my wallpaper.
Ahahahahahaaa okay hello.

Hairi : Oi kau suke makan subway kan?
Me : Asal?
Hairi : Jangan kau. Swine flu siol.
Me : Dengar dengar aku pergi subway stakat cekek babi pe.

Seriously it`s disgusting. From mad cow diseases to bird flu to this. Next what? Beef? Fish? Plants? This comes to show that we inhuman humans should consume clean, fresh first-hand nutritions. You cannot trust chefs. Though it includes your mother. Kay no la.

Eat the food from your own wok. Don`t eat hawker center food. In anycase that includes Pizza Hut because you irritating mofos, who are known for being retarded customers, are sucking the bejesus out of me. Why? Here`s an example.

Me : Okay sir your grand total after delivery charge and GST would be $24.43.
Cust : Eh! Why so much? I thought $19.90?
Me : Yes sir but that`s before delivery and GST charges.
Cust : Why delivery need charge one?
Me : I`m sorry if it disappoints you sir but that`s our current procedure.
Cust : No no I don`t care. I want to know why got this stupid extra charges one.

Kanina. Oi if my father own pizza hut then you can ask me la bodoh. If so expensive then go kopitiam eat biscuit mmmkay! Swine. Memang patut la kau kene flu.

2009-05-02T11:07:00.000-07:00

A mile at heart.

Spongebob : Hey Pat what`re gonna do while I`m away?
Patrick : Wait for you to come back.

Babypig, why do you have to go to National Service? Tell me which dumb terrorist wants to harm this puny little country? Singapore you are so selfless that you spare me with insufficient time.

Now I know how that cocky fat-ass pink star feels.

Sighszz.

2009-04-29T20:43:00.000-07:00

Hi mariame and hi guest!

I love you people and thank you although your comments have nothing to do with my problem against Hajar and Ain but since you guys are gluing your nuts into this matter then, welcome aboard!

Mariame you`re too kind to actually do such things for the sake of bringing me down. So cute so cute. Guest you must be the most cleverest amongst ze cleverest people to actually point out that stupendous mistake of mine. Bravo so clever so so clever.

Hello passerby!

You are very wise. God bless you.

Hi Nurul!

Mmm. Perhaps Wan is stupid to choose a girlfriend like me. I`m mean terrible stupid and whatever you think I am. I`m guessing you have the most flawless character such that if you had a boyfriend, your boyfriend must really treat you like a goddess. Good for you then. Now you can officially get the best girlfriend award.

And please, Soffey the awesome is just a nick name. If you`re using my own nick name to rebut against myself, proves alot from the root of your thinking. I may be a bad friend to some people but even if I`m not as awesome or good, I still have another world of people who are fine with me.

Oh I reckon you`re studying? Wah very clever. You and guest can go make babies already. By the way Wan and I hasn`t done any wrong to you so shut your itching pussy and don`t drag him into this. Thank you love you too!

Hi someone!

You`re right. Ain`s a great friend, a wonderful one. Good times good times. Since she`s a good friend, you do your part by not making my mistake. Though I`m wondering, what was my mistake?

Hello Hajar!

Hi how are you? I`m fine thank you. We`ll meet up soon and settle since you really wanna throw all the dung you have from your gap into my face. Can`t wait can`t wait! Besides I`m also dying to know how the heck I caused such a trouble in your little life.

By the way babe, same goes to you. If you weren`t happy with me, you should have called me in the first place. Like hello, I was clueless about this till I read your blog and tell me, if a person were to write something untrue about you, you wouldn`t just keep your ass still.

Hence that`s why I asked you and Ain or anyone (that is involved) to spray all your thoughts on my tagboard. I can call, infact I did. But I called the wrong person for this matter. My bad my bad. See you soonz!

Hi Ain!

Pose macam kenal? Semua pose kan kau punye. Apepe pose orang buat kan kirekan copy kau. Sorry la then. As you were saying, I spreaded rumours about you? I`ve been working my ass off the entire week and I barely had time to do anything nonsensical. Plus, you said I spreaded something about Syidah. Why the heck would I do that? I have nothing against her at all.

Even if this rumour was from last time, can you please think harder and recall who the fish I was hanging out with all that while? Who I was close to? (apart from my boyfriend of course) If you think you`re not happy with me, you could have just settled this easily by calling me straight, I just don`t understand why go the extra mile.

Alright that`s about all. I find it pointless to have a tagboard now, my blog looks so dirty and when I told people to tag, they misused it for the sake of personal attacking me. People people. As for the rest who weren`t picking sides, thankzz you very much when you die you will die peacefully.

2009-04-28T20:51:00.000-07:00

Tug tug tug!

So many people are unhappy with me. Whoooooooa got anymore to add on? Since aku da susahkan banyak orang (don`t know in what way) dalam dunia ni.

Ain, Hajar and whoever who needs a say upon any issue that`s buggin you people, go on, the tagboard`s all yours.

I`m waiting (:

2009-04-27T23:51:00.000-07:00

Hand me over your potion of love.

Off today. Didn`t have to pick up calls from people I don`t know and start attending to their crappy orders. Therefore, I thought I`d catch a movie with !W. So far 3 movies this month, very good Sof keep it up.

Before watching ze movie, we had Ben&Jerry`s. By the time I finished eating, it was already 7.20pm when by right our show was at 7.15pm. The plus pointer was we haven`t even bought food yet.

Fast and furious 4 ended at approximately 9pm. Frankly speaking, the movie was a drag for myself. Not much enthusiasm, pretty average to me. You can ask !W how bored I was but at least I get to conclude something.

Which is : Vin Diesel has vereeh verreeeh smexy voice.

After ze movie, !W, myself had dinner with my family over at Rex since it`s nearby. Love the food there.

Cooliosss! The power of shutter speed, lights and rokok.

Please eh please I don`t need your classical comments thank you.

Once our tummies were filled with ze glorious food, we all headed home. Tomorrow I`m working and that applies to ze rest of this week. Someone cry for me. Me in need of financial consultation.

And oh Qarl, as for Friday I can`t come. Split shift. Just send my sincere regards to those motherfuckers who are gonna be there. I miss you asspies alot. Trust me! Not lying okay! Well uhmm if let`s say IF I can hop by after work and prolly ton there, I will. I said IF ah IF ah. And that`s including IF those fuckers are tonning as well.

2009-04-27T20:38:00.000-07:00

Mmmmmkays so another world is crumbling beneath my feet eh?
Not a problem not a problem.

We all have different methods to how we treat our other halves. Obviously it may occur that mine`s relatively abusive in a way of words. To be truthful I wasn`t the meanie I sound like now, at least not till I got too comfortable with him.

That`s the problem with me. If I get too tied to my comfort zone, I wouldn`t learn to appreciate as much as when I was learning to adapt. I may look like the monster in ze relationship, bad enough I`ve heard what some had to say and accuse. You people may think I`m just trying too hard to be that way, perhaps a cluster may even think I`m just doing an imitation.

Sad to say, that`s when you just don`t know me sufficient enough.
Love youzz.

2009-04-26T11:32:00.000-07:00

At Mac D`s whilst having supper last night.

Me : Buy for me Mc Spicy.
!W : Fries you nak large?
Me : Nak. Besar besar eh. Sebesar dunia.
!W : Kay no problem just watch me at the counter kay baby.
Me : Don`t do anything stupid eh. Warning eh warning.

At the counter.

Cashier : Hello welcome to Mac Donald`s sir.
!W : Ah hi. I want 1 Mc Spicy meal ah.
Cashier : Upsize sir?
!W : Ya. Oh ya my girlfriend request that she want the fries big big.
Cashier : Sorry sir?
!W : She want big big like the world like that.
Cashier : Haha okay sir.
!W : Water also big ah cause her house no water one. Kay thank you.

Ahahahahahahahaha idiot.

2009-04-25T23:01:00.000-07:00

The thing is, it`s been about you.

Something he surprised me. By right, I wanted ze Animal brand actually cause it`s cheaper but tak pe la my boyfriend kan sugardaddy.

My dearest loveliest babypig,

I know I`m a blister to your ass most of the time. My attitude is one of a kind and that`s why you love me. I heart you. I`m sorry you had to flag a cab from Bugis to go to Toa Payoh just to make sure you reached our meeting-point before I do cause you know well that I won`t be waiting especially at such a sucky mood.

With a great big heart and a kiss from me to you won`t you say you love me too?

Love,
your awesome pain-in-the-ass grrlfriend.

Readers thank you for updating yourselves. May god prosper your beautiful faces.
Tu-daa.

2009-04-23T23:52:00.000-07:00

I demand, I want, I neeeeed!

Sometimes, I tend to forget, I don`t live on a mountain of gold coins or a river of credit cards. This is just 1/5 of what I`m eyeing on. Oi salesgirl ah, I only got $57.80 le in my wallet. Enough not?

2009-04-19T22:27:00.000-07:00

Bring me to your bottomless pit of joy.

Entertaining myself from one medium to another. Computer, PS2, PSP, my rabbit, television (which is so pointless to me. Jesus I hate the TV!) and back to where I started, the mother-lagging desktop.

Cheeeeeeeeeeeesesticks. Bubo`s favourite!

Fierce pe boxers rabbit aku?

Tidak dilayan. Engkau tak melayan diriku seperti dahulu *sings*. AHAHAHA jiwang pe?
Bubo you suck and that`s why I went back to You-tubing.

I just realised that I have more readers when I blog about something. Wah you readers also got attitude horx? Biase eh kamu kamu semua. Norty norty.

2009-04-19T19:59:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was a verreh tiring day. Spent nearly the whole day out.

So firstly the day started with me hanging out at the districts of Yishun with Joel, who was pathetically sick. But since I`m that annoying Sofia he knows, he couldn`t possibly ditch me for a lame fluspread. Even my friends pamper me. Nyeh heh heeeex.

We had lunch at Subway where I had a 1 foot long and a 6-inch meat ball marinara. Trust me I was veryyyy hungry. I even ate part of Joel`s Subway Melts. Ni semangat nak lose weight? Pegidaaa. Afterwhich, we met Shaj and her boyfriend at LJS. When we saw each other, we were hugging like mad I tell you.

Satu da macam sakit cancer yang lagi satu da macam mak orang. AHAHAHAAAX. Aku yang tetap awesome dan maintain. Ada betol ada betol? Betol forever.

We all left for our own agenda and plans. As for myself, I had to meet that babypig all the way at Bukit Panjang since we`re meeting the rest of his friends at Choa Chu Kang.

Shawal and Adi.

I hate break to this up to you people but !W takes the most oddest amongst the odds pictures you can ever imagine. Till the extend that I couldn`t tell if it was suppose to be a candid picture of me and Nad or a picture of that Choa Chu Kang sign.

Since it was Shawal`s birthday, they planned to have dinner over at town. But before that, the boys had their prayers at ze mosque whilst Naddy and I lingered by Paragon. Coincidentally there was this very adorable balloon saying happy birthday, Naddy got it for Shawal. Cute giler babzz.

Food at Garuda`s nice though I`m not really a fan of rice or anything local-ish, I manage to gobble nearly whatever that was served. They surprised Shawal with a cake. Chocolate somemore. Sedap oi!

They BPGH. Me NSS. Tak geng ah. Ahaha no la, they`re a friendly bunch (:

Happy Birthday Shawal!

Once eating was done, Naddy, Shawal, Adi, !W and myself took the train back home but !W and I bailed for Woodlands first to slack for a little while longer. There was a fun fair but by the time we reached, it was already closing. Alaa see la baby you walk so slow. Tsk! Ahahaaax.

That nose if prolly the reason why I love him.
So shaaarp. I so jealous la you!

It`s Sunday today. No plans no plans. Like finally! Hallelujah, I`ll sieze today to spend quality time with my rabbit, Bubo! Besides, I have a room to clean. Here`s a dig, mother said that she might wanna sell this house. Oh mee godzilla this ish sooo notz kewlz. Me love me homez.

Thiz. Suckx. Ballzz.

2009-04-16T20:40:00.000-07:00

Burning in your arms.

Hello my dear family. I know you guys are reading my blog. I`m not stupid, I`m not daft, I know every fucken thing that`s happening. Don`t like what I`m doing and feel like complaining to my babypig? Go ahead. I don`t really care. Try using him to change me and see what happens.

(Since you guys really lalalove seeing me miserable and enjoy ruining my relationship from one guy to another, from one friend to another. Best sangat la korang.)

Nonetheless, welcome to march of the dicks. Keep marching and dip into a drool of my private life of plasticity.

2009-04-16T06:06:00.000-07:00

Whispers "Hello I miss you quite terribly".

Being a beggar is saddening. Very. In my case I was begging for jobs today. Golly, I feel for you beggars, I`m sorry for you all. I promise to do more charity work whenever I have the urge to waste my money on flashy clothes and bags. Okay? Nonsense Sof nonsense.

Was pleading from place to place for job vacancies and nearly all seem to be on a short-listing process. I hope I get into the admin line. So after an exhausting journey, baby and I headed for Gelare for some ice-creeeeeam because I was badly craving for some.

My forever hungry babypig. Ehee hee heex.

After eating ice-cream, I was still hungry thence we both ate again at Mac Donalds. Siol ah 3 days in a row I`ve been feeding on Mc Spicy, upsize somemore. Horrible horrible.

Then we took a bus to !W`s workplace where I applied for another job, thinking if I get accepted on ze spot it could kill time meanwhile waiting for my other application results. Surprisingly his manager just accepted me without further ado. Baby you better not have anything to do with this eh klau tak sumpah my blood naik tingkat tiga. Why tiga? Don`t ask.

By the time I ended the interview, !W had to report in for work. So from there, we parted and I was itching to get a hair-trim. Did so and now I`m feeling uhmm.. the same actually. Ahahax! But my head feels a tinsy bit lighter.

Starting my training for work on Monday. Wah sia, I`m working at the same place as my boyfriend. Talk about no air. Bahek or whuuuut. Happy new year ah Sof all ze best.

2009-04-15T10:08:00.000-07:00

You`re sweeter than sugar-free candy.

Dzul : Soffey! Oh my god what happened to you?
Me : What?! What happen?
Dzul : Why are you so thin?! Your boyfriend torture you eh?
Me : Eh no la.
Dzul : Yeah I know. Impossible.
Me : Why?
Dzul : You like seeing people in pain.

1) Met DzulFucker (Bax) for a while in the evening.
2) Watched my cousin perform for her school`s Malay Dance outside Taka after a session with Fucker.
3) During the choir performance, I had a 5 minute crush on the choir instructor.
4) The choir instructor was uber cute.
5) Fucker called me skinny, it made my day for 1 hr. Congratulations Fucker you rock.
6) At night I met doink at Yio Chu Kang for a "Let`s-settle-this-and-get-back-to-our-love-lives" talk.
7) I didn`t know my boyfriend is that understanding. (Lalalove you d-d-doinkey!)
8) I weigh 52 kg now. Oh me godzilla me fat fuck fuck fat.
9) I want to weigh 48kg. Fats, please eat yourself away thank you.
10) Tomorrow is going to be one solid day where I`d be hovering from place to place pleading for vacancy to make money.
11) I am going to be a beggar for jobs tomorrow.
12) Why do I feel so poor nowadays?
13) Why shouldn`t I feel poor when there`s only $15.35 cents left in my wallet?
14) I think I`m sick.
15) No wait, I don`t think I`m sick. I am sick.

Baby baby that bag at forever 21 is still very attractive to me. Do something do something! Anything, as long as you don`t steal because I don`t like the smell at prison.

2009-04-14T08:48:00.000-07:00

Why did you have to take my love?

I know I sound like a no-life fag because I`ve been meeting my boyfriend nearly everyday. Alaa, must spend time together together what lagi lagi when you know he`s probably going to NS anytime soon. Sibeh wah piang oi, who will listen to me gegerl hectic drama if you go sia babyyy? Well, he`ll be goin if he doesn`t get his appeal successful. Anyways apart from that, nearly all my friends are already schooling, leaving me to my main root of attention, !W.

Ah yes, how was today? !W took MC from work due to his not-subsidizing pain from his injured thigh. Gara-gara degil nak mampos, ah padan muke. Therefore before I proceed with my plans (with ze family) I dropped by Bukit Panjang to kill time with him and and my little brother followed me.

First, we ate at Mac Donalds then Ilyas was asking !W if there was time-zone. Sadly there was. Kids being kids and half-men being kids, they both dragged me to time-zone where I had to tolerate their nuisance.

When they raced, guess who won? My fat ass little brother did! In your face baby! Muah haa haax! But when I played air-hockey with !W, he was so mean. He didn`t let me win. Stupid. Me no like. Baby you loser siooolszsxs.

At about evening, Ilyas and I met my family over at Centerpoint. Had ice-cream at Haagen-daaz, then shopped for a while followed by dinner at some restaurant.

At a nick of time while I was eating, Haqim text messaged me asking if I wanted to have a catch-up session. Why not? I missed him like hell.

So aye, we lepraked at Bottle Tree Park. Strummed the guitar, updated him a world load of things. Now my Haqim sapau already know? Me verreh proud of him but too bad, he`s still shorter and skinnier than me. Ahahaaax.

Planning for a meet-up/picnic/beach-outing with ze long lost clan. It`s time we most catch-up and skip that nifty side baggage with our halves. Hopefully I`ll get to see you morons soon.
Tu-daa.

2009-04-13T23:35:00.000-07:00

Because the past has nothing to do with us now.

Celebrated our first month at my aunt`s place, a very odd manner I know. Disappointed babe cause he thought I had a flooding agenda for just the 2 of us today. Sorry baby I didn`t feel like wasting (your) money today. Nyeh heh hehx.

Had pizzas, ice-cream, chocolatey bites, movie marathon and I was minding my own wax half the time while baby was busy bitching with my aunt and uncle. Sorry la I can`t be bothered to listen to you all bitch about your working lives. I have sleep to catch on you know. Serious business one, don`t pwray pwraaay hor.

But, most importantly I love it how you prove my aunt and uncle that you`re worthy of being mine. Love you doink!

2009-04-13T09:35:00.000-07:00

1 month with my #1, NurizuONE.
(Sorry I just had to do that)

All you have to know is that you`re a stubborn asshole that I`m absolutely in love with and if you think you`ve got a stinky attitude, you still can`t beat mine. We may compete in silly things like this but it`s a witty tale we`re building aye baby? Love you and stop sucking my blood. You can suck my fats just not my blood because me wanna lose me extra baggage.

Thank you very awesome for the trust, the care, the love and the times.

May this chapter blossom relentlessly.

2009-04-11T10:14:00.000-07:00

Baby it`s fact.

The moment I rised, I made last minute plans with Hartini, for the sake of a short meet up after not seeing/ updating her for such a lengthy period. I missed her terribly too! However, I totally forgot that I had to meet !W at Orchard, at 2pm.

Hippy forever eh Qarl? Dari aku gemok sampai aku tak segemok, kau tetap sama.

When I go out with Hartini, confirm plus chop guarantee 100%, I`ll eat HALAL food.

Due to us taking our own sweet time rambling while finishing our food, Aliyyah, Elfie and I reached Orchard at 4.30pm. Oh you don`t know how pissed babe was. But as usual, he can`t be mad for long because he knows very well that I`ll get mad too. So if we both get mad than might as well have a date at IMH. Correct babyyyy? Yes, correct.

I really felt like slapping his face. Dah la tadi buat perangai ngan aku. Kanina.

Had lunch at Plaza Singapura`s Burger King then caught the 7.20 show at Cathay. I swear watching Unborn was a total waste of money (to my perspective) because I only watched like 20 minutes of that show since I was closing my eyes for rest of ze time. Scary siooolszx!

Slippers I bought for the doink in commemorate of our 1 month. Supposedly on the 13th but since I saw it the other day, I got it on the spot and passed it to him yesterday. Please eh aku tak menggalakkan matair aku jadi matrep kay thanks alot.

By the time ze movie ended, it was already 9-ish. Babe flagged for a cab and we all headed for the Flyers. I just went there the day before actually, dang. Well, no harm going again but the sucky part was I didn`t get to eat Popeye`s because my boyfriend just sucks. No la he don`t. I just felt like saying that. Ahahax. By right, the place was packed with no-life Singaporeans.

Clueless, we 4 chilled by the bay and sang songs to one another. Talk about jiwang. Hellyeeeeah we are. But the sad sad part was babe didn`t send me home. He left me with Aliyyah and Elfie. Eew baby you so tak romantic lorx. Call yourself a boyfriend? Jalandaa! Ahahax he took ze bus cause his dad had to meet him somewhere I don`t (and don`t want to) know.

Great day.

PS : Baby baby that bag from Forever 21 is soooooo pretty
and nice and attractive. Right right right? Eheh heh heh heh heh hehx.